
Apple Intelligence Announced: Siri Finally Goes to College
2024-06-11
On June 10, 2024, the Apple Worldwide Developers Conference (WWDC24) officially kicked off. While OpenAI and Google had already been waging intense, highly-publicized Large Language Model wars for a year, Apple, the fashionably late guest, finally sauntered in holding its own shiny trophy: Apple Intelligence.
"Instead of entering the cloud compute arms race with a standalone chatbot, Apple decided to cram its AI directly into your phone, assuring you with religious-level fervor that they won't peek at your secrets. The AI strictly works locally."
This momentous occasion also signifies that Siri, widely mocked for years as the class clown of voice assistants, has finally earned its Ph.D. From this day onward, Siri actually comprehends human language, helps you passively aggressively rewrite work emails, summarizes your overwhelmingly cluttered notifications, and can even turn your crude photo scribbles into a slightly less crude AI-generated dog.
Regardless of the late entry, the world's most colossal consumer electronics empire has fully embraced generative AI. The only real downside is that to experience this newfound brilliance, you'll almost certainly need to buy a brand-new iPhone.